Letting go

How do you let go of someone you have loved more than everything? I wonder. Letting go of a person who means the world to you, letting them go because they want to, letting them go because you did not have a choice, letting them go because destiny snatched them away, letting them go so that you could meet them again, a hope burning in your heart like a fire, letting them go because you did not know what else to do, no matter what the reason letting go has not always been the most pleasant feeling. Yet willingly or unwillingly we all have to let go of someone or something in our lives.

We often wonder at such moments how would we survive? Would we get lost in the void? Would we ever rise to a new dawn or would this night never end? Often the sorrow is so deep that we become numb, incapable to think anything, nothing seems to go backward or forward. Life becomes a stop-motion film. We are so afraid to let go that the one moment we have with us feels like eternity and we wish with all our heart that time must stop forever. I watched Pearl Harbour and wondered how did Evelyn let go of Rafe? With all the love she had in her heart for him, how did she let him go, knowing he might or might not come back? And I said to myself heaven knows how many Evelyn’s and Rafe’s lived, live now and will live. No one knows. Letting go of someone I think is what only a brave soul can do, but at times life doesn’t ask you whether you’re brave or not. You get to ask no questions, even if you do, you might never get the answers, and still you have to let go.

You can only live knowing that your heart beats for that person and that you loved that person with your whole being. And yet sometimes you never let go.

Happy Birthday Harry

Dear Harry,

I thought for a long while what I should be writing. I struggled with words, trying to find the most eloquent ones. But here I am, with these ones, Happy Birthday Harry, I cannot tell you how much you mean to me. All my childhood and all my teenage years, I’ve grown up with you. It only seems so strange that you’re not around now. I just know this that wherever you are, you are living a happily ever after, so I’m glad for you from the bottom of my heart.

Dear friend, I wish to tell you, that you’ve left behind so many great memories that make me laugh and cry, both at the same time. I was going through your life today, captured in a reel, and I must say, so many breath-taking moments filled me with awe, your sorting into Gryffindor house, your combat with the Basilisk in the chamber of secrets, your first flight with Buckbeak, you asking Cho out for the yule ball, training Dumbledore’s army under Umbridge’s nose, you shedding tears when Dumbledore left us, you, Ron and Hermione entering the Ministry of Magic, breaking into Gringotts, BRILLIANT!!!, facing the truth of Severus, facing death in the Forbidden Forest, coming back from the dead and defeating Voldemort for the final time, marrying Ginny and waving Albus-Severus to Hogwarts. What a journey, my friend!  Memories, all are memories, woven together forever in threads of love, courage, friendship and every other feeling which is inexplicable. Memories, in my heart, my soul, my inmost being, timeless, your memories, my memories, no one can take them away from me. I’ve lived with you Harry and all I want to say is I miss you, I miss you so much.

I believe in you Harry Potter and you will always be in my heart till the stars shine, till the moon rise. I love you Harry and I will always love you. Thank you J.K. for telling us the legendary story about the boy who lived, like who could be no other. Harry is a smile that cheers me up even in the darkest of times. For this I am eternally grateful to you. And Happy Birthday to you J May you be blessed abundantly and may you always bring to the world stories the world is yet to read, and never forget.

Yours magically,

Preeti

Hey Jude...

“Hey Jude, Don’t make it bad, take a sad song and make it better. Remember to let her into your heart, then you can start to make it better. Hey Jude, Don’t be afraid, you were made to go out and get her. The minute you let her under your skin, then you begin to make it better. Anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain, don’t carry the world upon your shoulders.”

As I walk away from you I get nostalgic, I remember the good days…the summers, the monsoon and the winters…you filled each of them with sugar sweet memories. Walking away from you might be the biggest mistake I could ever make in my life and maybe I would never stop regretting it right till the end. I have no clue where life is about to lead you and me. All I hope we are going the right way that is I mean to say, to our destinies. Well, I just want to tell you what walking away from you means to me. For all the love and care, you have given me, I’ve become so attached to you that living without you will definitely be a new and challenging experience. With you I never doubted that I could live a life full of comforts, stability and wellbeing. You held me right before I could ever fall. You made sure that I was always fine in spite of the fact that you suffered the scars and bruises. You were a Father to the child who shun looking at the world, was afraid to let the light of the day shine upon her grim face. You taught her to walk by holding her tiny fingers firm in your strong palms. Every step she walked she grew strong, you grew weak but proud. You looked into her eyes and whispered in her ears, “Don’t be afraid, I’m here (and will always be here)”. You never let her stumble. You put your arms around her when she felt alone. You wiped her tears when her eyes were wet. So walking away from you will mean facing the cold world alone, falling, stumbling, getting bruised, bleeding with pain, bleeding till it doesn’t stop. Maybe for endless days, for sleepless nights. It is like leaving my strongest refuge. The shadow of your wings never let the heat of the sun burn my skin, but now…I have to be on my own. It might mean making mistakes, mistakes grave and deep, mistakes that maybe I won’t be able to correct or will be left behind by time to set right. If I ever try and return from this journey of afflictions, I know not where you will be at that moment in time. Will the distance part you or will the time be cruel? I know that this means losing the one true gem I’ve found for eternity. But it has to get worse before it gets better. I walk away to find new horizons, to take a pilgrimage into my own soul, to dare to meet the devil, to look straight into the face of my fears, to bear the consequences of impulse and ecstasy and to get shattered forever. I hope the phoenix rises from the ashes. I hope I return with the renewed strength of an eagle after I pass through this eternal fire. I hope that the rose blooms even at twilight. I hope I find you back in the door of my heart. I hope to put the broken pieces of glass again together to make a beautiful picture. I hope to write our song when the dawn is lighting up the deep blue sky. I hope…and I am not afraid.